just some thoughts...

So, I was reading this book, The Unquenchable Worshipper by Matt Redman (he's the guy that wrote 'heart of worship'.) The whole book is good (I just finished it), but when I got to the end something just awed me to think of all that's to come...the book said, "The more we see of Jesus, the more we know there's still so much to be seen. The more He touches our lives, the more we realize our desperate need for Him to consume every part of us." And when I read that, that's what I wanted. I've always wanted that, but it's so hard to actually be able to get there...and while school is going on -man, it's hard to do anything but school. Dorito, Mary, and I talk a lot about how we don't have time for life to actually happen because nursing doesn't allow for that. When my friends suddenly die in a car wreck, when Dorito has to deal with all the family issues she has, when Mary just needs to talk to her family, when we just need a moment to talk and cry -we can't...there's no time. We can never separate ourselves from the duties and responsibilities of school and how it never ends and never allows for life to happen. And more than that, school is so overwhelming it becomes so difficult to allow God to consume us...we try -and that's why I love my roommates. But in the back of our mind it seems that we can never fully separate ourselves from the thoughts of what we must get done. I suppose if you think about it, that's probably what 'real life' is like. I suppose that your employer won't care...so, I guess that's why it's good to have people around you who are so into Jesus and God and want you to be too. School seems to make worship difficult. It's more a ritual -I go because that's what God, friends, family expect of me...and I like going, but am I really worshipping? I want to want to worship God with everything that is in me...I want Him to know that I love Him more than anything -not just because He knows everything, but because He can see it in my life...

Okay, so maybe I'm crazy...and maybe I rambled on a little too much, but those are my thoughts right now -I just wanted to share them with you.
Psalm 103:1-5